Like Kyoko
by theunknownvoice
Summary: When Tohru suffers the same fate as her mother will she be able to cope with the loss and raise her son?
1. The Cat

Like Kyoko

By: theunkownvoice

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 1: The Cat

Tohru stood over the grave tears streaming down her face. They had broken the curse and survived the trials but it was all a waste. She had lost her love just like her mother had.

She remembered her mother's words, the bittersweet tale of her parents' love. Kyoko had spoken of the hardness of life before Katsuya. To Kyoko the world was a dangerous small place. Violence had painted her everyday living.

Katsuya had rescued her. They were eighteen years apart but that didn't matter because they loved each other. They were happy. In her earliest memories Tohru could remember the gentle man her father was. She could remember how he had made her mother laugh at his odd ways.

Tohru hadn't understood when he didn't come home. She hadn't understood when they cremated him. She just knew her father wasn't coming back.

That had been her first loss, her first taste of the bitter blackness that was death. It was barely a tangible memory but her father's death had overshadowed her childhood.

The loss of Kyoko was forever enshrined in her memory. She could still remember hearing about the accident for the first time. Fear had held her heart in an icy grip and tears had streamed down her face. Her world had come crashing down and Tohru knew what it was like to be truly alone. . Kyoko's death still reverberated through her affecting everything she did and now she had lost _him_.

Kyo was her savior. He was her love. He had been broken but so had she. He had fixed her emptiness and she had given him peace. They were happy and their son was a shining example of that happiness.

She watched the boy with darkened eyes. Hikaru was his father's son. The same crimson eyes and orange hair graced him. He was a miniature Kyo in looks and in temperament.

Would he remember his father? She barely remembered her own and most of it was through her mother's constant stories. Would his memories be fragmented and distorted? Would he feel the pain and loss she had felt?

Kyo had been taken from her because of pneumonia. He had been caught out in the rain for an entire night trapped and unable to find any shelter. She hadn't understood what had happened or why. He had called her from work telling her that he would be home soon. She had waited for him to come but he never did.

When she found him the next morning he was passed out on the doorstep. He was deathly white and she screamed in fear that she had lost him. He must have somehow managed to walk home from the grove where he had been stranded. His leg looked like it had been caught on something. She could see the blood pouring out of the gash.

He was a shadow of himself. His normally lively crimson eyes were hazed with fever. His face was cold to the touch.

She called the doctor immediately but no matter what they did Kyo grew worse. His body shook with coughing and his fever raged. Eventually she reached out towards Hatori who she hadn't spoken to in months. He rushed in to help her take care of Kyo but there was nothing that either one of them could do.

She sat with Kyo in the hospital as he whispered in her name through the fever. He was so lost and confused. He didn't know she was there. It was late at night that his breathing stopped.

It was that instant that Tohru wanted to die. She wanted to be buried with him but her son stopped her from thinking that way. The six year old boy was terrified about what was happening and he needed her.

She was young barely twenty-five and already a widow. She could have killed herself. It would have been the easy way out but she refused to give in. Her son needed her.

The funeral had just ended and the sky was bright and beautiful. The birds sang cheerfully from the treetops. The flowers in the Sohma graveyard were in full blown.

Tohru wept at the sight of a beautiful summer day. It was as if Kyo's presence in the world was not even missed. Was he that insignificant? Why had the world kept going when Kyo wasn't in it? Did his death not matter?

They stood in black clothing, a somber group with eyes downcast. Every member of the former Junishi stood in a massive cluster gazing solemnly at the grave. The man they had shunned in life was now forever ingrained in their memories as a father and husband.

Tears poured down their faces. He had never been in the inner most circle but he was one of them. Even Akito wept bitterly at the loss of Kyo. She who was supposed to die young had outlived the boy who she had once hated.

Hana and Uo stood beside themselves. Neither had married. Their relationships had disintegrated in brief instances and both were still looking for their perfect match. Because of their own martial status, Tohru's grief rocked them to the core. Tohru who had lost everything and always smiled seemed like she would break.

A funeral is a confusing place for a six year old boy. Hikaru stood next to his Uncle Yuki and Aunt Machi saying nothing. He watched as his mother's tears watered the ground. Anger coursed through his small body.

How dare his father leave them? How dare his father die when he needed him?

He would never have a brother or sister now. He would never feel the safety of his father's arms or hear the whispered, "I love yous."

His father was a strong man. His father could defeat any challenge.

Why had he not fought the pneumonia harder? Why had he left them?

He ran towards the grave. His little feet repeatedly kicking the stone as he beat upon the grave.

He threw himself on the ground screaming, "I hate you. I hate you. You weren't supposed to leave us. Didn't you love me enough to stay? I HATE YOU!"

"No Hikaru," his mother said her tears still streaming. "He loved you. Your daddy loved you.'

The boy ran from the funeral. He ran as far as his little legs could carry him. He wanted to get away from them all. He wanted go somewhere that didn't stink of death. He saw the great tree standing off far in the distance. If he could just reach it then maybe then he could climb to the heavens. Maybe from a higher place he wouldn't feel so lonely.

When he came to the weeping willow his strength finally gave out. The tears he had long since been fighting came out. The weeping willow what had Okaasan called it? The crying tree.

He lay there on the ground kicking and screaming. His tears came in a flood. Strong hands grabbed his tiny hand before he could hit the ground again.

"You don't want to hurt yourself," a man said.

He stared at this man who was a stranger to him. He had seen the man standing with the other Sohmas at the funeral. Hikaru only knew Uncle Yuki and Grandpa Kazuma from his father's side of the family. His parents had moved away from this area when he was three and they rarely visited. Though he knew that his mother often called the other Sohmas and kept contact life had led them to drift away from each other.

"Why are you angry?" the man asked him.

"He left us," the boy whispered tears streaming down his face.

"Kyo was one of the world's most stubborn people. He wouldn't want to leave you or your mother."

"How would you know?" the boy screamed. "He was supposed to be stronger! He was supposed to come home to us! He was supposed to wake up so I could have a brother or sister!"

The boy prepared to beat upon the ground again. Why had his Otousan left him?

Gently the man knelt down and cradled the boy. Hikaru kicked and struggled but the stranger refused to let go. He held the boy as the sobs racked the frail body.

It was when his crying finally ended that Hikaru finally gazed at the man. He was tall and older than Hikaru's father. His hair was the color of red autumn leaves and his eyes were a warm brown.

"Gomen," the boy whispered when he was caught gawking.

The stranger chuckled before offering the boy his hand leading him back towards the funeral.

To be continued….


	2. The Boy

Chapter 2: The Boy

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

"What if he wandered off and hurt himself? I need my baby. I need my son. Which direction did he go?" Tohru yelled frantically.

Her grandfather gently touched her shoulder.

"It will be alright Tohru-chan. The boy couldn't have gotten far," he said.

Tohru continued to run around in circles. She would have gone searching if Uo and Hana had not made her sit down.

Every single member of the zodiac had gone chasing after the boy. Kazuma was sure Hikaru couldn't have gotten far but Tohru doubted it. When he was angry Hikaru was very reckless and she feared the worst.

"What if he wandered into oncoming traffic and a car was speeding down the road and didn't see him and he was hit?" she blurted out her feelings rambling quickly.

Her eyes darted with fear as if she expected to see the accident happen before her.

"Okaasan," Hikaru called out once he saw Tohru.

The stranger had led him back to his mother quickly. Hikaru had said little to nothing as he took the older man's hand. The man guided him back to the graveyard and once his mother was in sight Hikaru raced off.

She turned her head towards the boy immediately.

"Hikaru-chan!" she yelled relieved as she raced over to her son and hugged tight him.

"Don't scare me like that again. I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you," she whispered.

"Gomen Okaasan, gomen," he repeated as he kissed her cheeks.

She smiled softly at the boy's words.

It was then that he remembered how he had gotten back. He removed himself from his mother's embrace and ran back to towards the direction they had come.

"Hikaru," Tohru called.

"I'll be right back," he called back. "I have to thank him for helping me find you."

Tohru stared at her grandfather and her two friends. Quietly she followed the boy the group coming with her.

Hikaru ran to find the stranger staring at a grave.

"Who's buried there?" the boy asked genuinely curious.

"My father," the man answered. "He died when I was fifteen. He wasn't as close to me as your father was to you."

"Did you love him?"

"Yes though I don't think he liked me a lot."

"Why didn't he like you?"

The stranger didn't answer. "I thought you would be with your mother."

"I was with her but I remembered I forgot to do something."

The man stared at him for a second slightly confused. Slowly the boy approached him and hugged him.

"Arigato, I couldn't have found Okaasan without you."

Kureno stood stalk still as the boy hugged him. It had been a long time since he had been hugged by a child and he was still startled.

Tohru emerged from the clearing. She had been following her son but with her train of escorts she hadn't been able to come quickly.

The boy quickly bounded over to her once she came into sight.

"He's the one that found me," Hikaru said pointing at Kureno.

"Arigato Kureno-san. I was so worried," she said as picked up her son.

"I'm glad I was able help you, Tohru-san."

"You know him Okaasan?" the boy asked slightly confused.

"Kureno-san is Otousan's cousin," she answered.

"You're a Sohma?" the boy asked his eyebrows perking.

Kureno nodded. "I didn't know you're father that well. I'm nine years older than him."

"If you're a Sohma are you my uncle like Uncle Yuki?"

Kureno looked slightly startled.

"I don't know," he answered.

The boy frowned. "How can you not know?"

"Yes, Kureno is your uncle just as all of the Sohma men who came today are your uncles. We were all once close. You have a whole family you get to meet with uncles and aunts and cousins," Tohru answered slowly.

The boy smiled and clung to his mother.

Kureno's eyes warily met Uo's. The relationship between him and Arisa had not worked out. He had loved her but they couldn't survive on that.

He was a grown man who at age twenty-six knew nothing of the world. He didn't know how to care for himself or what he supposed to do. He didn't understand the intricacies of the world or the deceptiveness of people. He couldn't fend for himself and he had never worked a job outside of the Sohma family's businesses.

In truth he hadn't been an individual since he was sixteen years old if he had ever been an individual at all. Before that the curse had kept him bound and he was unable to be himself. He was condemned to a life of being a Sohma and a possession of Akito.

With Arisa he had tasted freedom and love not based on oaths or loyalty. He had been free to love her but he hadn't been free from his own demons. At times Kureno hated himself and at times he hated what he did.

It came to him one day that he was like a drowning man desperately grappling pieces of the shipwreck to survive. He didn't know what to do with himself. He didn't have a place to go or a home to return to. The relationship between him and Arisa was based on two lost people grappling to hold onto something. He was using her as a crutch in order to survive in this unfamiliar world.

His entire life he had given of himself selflessly. His entire life he had been someone else's support and he didn't want to become that for Arisa. He wanted it be a partnership. Instead it was one of them leaning on the other one. So for the first time in his life Kureno Sohma decided to be selfish.

He didn't leave without telling her. He was through being a coward and he was through hating himself.

"I have to go," he said to her one morning.

"Go where?" she asked barely looking up from her breakfast. "We don't need anything from the store."

"I wasn't talking about the store. I have to move out," he answered.

Immediately she dropped her fork.

"But why?" she demanded.

"Because this isn't working. I'm not what you need. You need someone stronger than me."

"That's absurd."

"Arisa, we aren't happy. This isn't working."

"So you're running away?" she demanded her eyes glowing.

"No, I'm not running away. For the first time I'm making a choice for myself. I need to find out who and what I am. My entire life I've lived in a box and I can't live in a box with you no matter how appealing the idea is. I need to become myself before I can ever love someone the way you deserved to be loved."

"Will you come back?" she asked softly.

"Forget about me. I just want to be only a memory to you."

He had grabbed his few meager possessions and made his way to the car. He had enough money in his bank account to last him a while. He would make his way through life.

"Kureno!" she called after him.

He didn't look back.

Her eyes were hardened as she looked at him now. He could see the old feelings still lurking in her but they had been extinguished in him long ago. He couldn't go back to her. He wasn't the person she thought he was.

"Are you coming to the wake?" Tohru asked him breaking the tension between the two former lovers.

His gaze once again focused on Tohru and little boy cradled in her. The crimson eyes gazed back at him as if reading through him. He had never before felt like his soul had been laid bare. He shook his head for a second before gathering his thoughts.

"I'll be there. I need to find my ride though."

"Eh? Who did you come with?"

"Kureno, Hatori and I have been looking for you everywhere," Mayu said as she approached the group. "I see the boy was found."

"Oh how stupid of me, I forgot to tell the others that we found him. Everyone is searching when I've had him here for the last fifteen minutes. How could I be so thoughtless?" Tohru rambled.

"Tohru calm down. The others will understand," Hana said. "Arisa and I will go tell them. Why don't you, Hikaru and your grandfather go back to the car."

"Arigato, Hana-cha," Tohru said as she began walking to the car.

Uo remained frozen to the ground still staring at Kureno. Part of her wanted to beat the living daylights out of him and part of her wanted to hug him. Kureno, however, simply began walking back to the car with Mayu, the boy, Tohru's grandfather and Tohru.

Gently Arisa felt the tug on her hand as Hana pulled her away from the spot. Her eyes left Kureno as she and Hana headed towards the area the others were last known to be at.

"Kureno-san?" Tohru said before entering the car.

"Yes?" Kureno asked.

He hoped she wouldn't ask him if he was going back to Arisa. He would not change his mind regardless of what anyone thought.

"How did you know where Hikaru-chan was?"

He felt relief course through him.

"He is Kyo's son in many ways. He acts a lot like him. Whenever Kyo was upset while visiting Sohma house he would run off and find a high place. Hikaru is the same. He was near a group of trees when I found him. He probably would've climbed up if I hadn't come when I did."

She smiled sadly as she entered the car.

No, her son wouldn't forget Kyo because she wouldn't let him.

To be continued….


	3. The Riceball

Chapter 3: The Riceball

Tohru had been able to maintain the calm façade for a few moments. Inside the Sohma main house the others had gathered for the wake. The murmured sympathizes had made her feel hollow.

She didn't want to hear how Kyo had been a good man. She didn't want to hear how he adored her. She didn't want to hear about the good things he had done.

She just wanted him to appear out of nowhere and tell her he was fine. She wanted him to wrap his arms around her and hold her. She wanted him to kiss her and then drag her into their bedroom. She wanted him there to make love to and be loved by.

She sat there in the back the main house feeling numb. Every member of the Sohma family had expected her to feel shock. They had seen the tears and they knew of her grief.

She hadn't been in this house in over three years and she hadn't been in this area even longer. She and Kyo had both decided to leave behind this town but now she knew she would have to remain. They had wanted to start a life far away from the shadows of the Sohma curse but she didn't want to return to that life now. That life was a life that she and Kyo had built together and without Kyo it no longer held any meaning.

She had been a stay at home mother but she couldn't do that now. She would have to go back to work. The money that Kyo had saved would not last them for long. She would have to find a way to support them very soon for Hikaru's sake if not her own.

She would accept no charity but she knew that she wasn't alone. The other Sohmas would help because she was Tohru and because Kyo was one of them. She didn't want any of them offering to pay the bills. She had firmly opposed Hatori when he offered to help her pay for the funeral.

"Kyo was my husband and it is my duty to take care of it. Don't worry Hatori-san. Kyo always made sure we had money for emergencies," she had said.

Her eyes flicked out of the memory towards Hikaru. He stood quietly by himself. His crimson eyes were red from crying and he looked exhausted and lonely.

Her little boy was doomed to be an only child. She had wanted more children but Kyo was afraid for her health. Hikaru's birth had been difficult.

For a few days she had been hospitalized. The birth had taken a toll on her but the doctor said that it was because she was so young. If they waited for a while they could have more children and the risk to her health would decrease greatly.

"_One more year love and we'll give Hikaru a sister or brother. One more year," he told her over and over._

She had been planning for this new baby. She had bought a new crib and a new baby mattress. She repainted Hikaru's old nursery. She had prepared and planned and waited for this baby but now the baby would not come. Her son would be an only child just as she was and just as Kyo was.

She knew that she couldn't step foot inside her house for a while. There would be no peace for her if she walked into that dark house. She couldn't return to that place and make herself whole. She would leave and start a new life. It wasn't that she was leaving Kyo behind it was just that the memories were too painful for her.

Kyo had been so excited when they could finally afford a house of their own. He had practically jumped for joy. The first night at that house the three of them watched the stars from the roof. Hikaru lay squashed in between them while Tohru rested her head on Kyo's chest. She had never felt so loved. It was as if the world was perfect.

She could still remember his smell and the excitement in his voice. He loved her and she loved him back. He was her Kyo and she was his Tohru. Must all beautiful things end in tragedy?

Hikaru had been fascinated by the main house. There were so many people there. The noises and the various voices calling out his name had bewitched the little boy. He was still withdrawn from the people.

He wanted to hear the familiar voice of his father. He wanted to see the small shy smile that his father gave only to a few precious people. He wanted to hear his father and Uncle Yuki argue. He wanted to hear his father complain about "the stupid rat." He still had no clue why his father called his uncle a rat and his uncle called his father the "good for nothing cat."

Instead all he saw was the sea of faces and no sign of his father anywhere.

He watched his mother as she rocked herself back and forth the tears streaming down her face. The sight terrified him. He knew that she was sad but what if--

He dared not voice his fear. What would happen to him if his mother left him too? Where would he go? Who would take care of him?

Tohru brought her head up. She couldn't break down now. Her son was all that she had left of Kyo.

Was this how her mother felt? Was this bitter throbbing pain similar to Kyoko's loss of Katsuya? How had her mother continued living with this pain? How had her mother coped with the loss when it was only her and Tohru?

At least Hikaru had been spared cruel words at the funeral. No one had accused him of not being Kyo's son. No one had caused her child the pain she had felt by thoughtless tongues.

_Okaasan, I wish you had been with me longer so I knew what to do. You were so strong. You wanted to die but you kept living for me. You kept living for me. _

_Otousan, I'm sorry I ever blamed you. I don't want my son to blame Kyo like I blamed you. You didn't want to leave me and neither did Okaasan. Gomen. _

_Kyo, please come back. I don't want to be left behind. Kyo, I love you. Kyo, let's stay together always._

Tohru continued to rock herself all the while Hikaru watched. His body tensed as her tears continued to stream. He wanted to hug her. He wanted to bring his father back. He would do anything to make his mother smile.

"KYO, WHY?" she screamed the pain becoming too much to hold in. "WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME? WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME? I LOVE YOU! COME BACK! COME BACK! I CAN'T DO THIS WITHOUT YOU! WE WERE SUPPOSED TO HAVE A FUTURE! WE WERE SUPPOSED TO GIVE HIKARU A BROTHER OR SISTER! WHY KYO? WHY?"

The action in the room changed quickly. Several of the women in the room rushed to his mother. His aunts Hana and Uo hugged her close wrapping their arms tenderly around her.

"Come sit with me," a woman said as she pulled him away from his grief stricken mother.

Hikaru at first was afraid to go but the woman smiled brightly. She picked him up gently and brought him to the group of Sohma males who were standing helpless.

He was afraid but this woman made him feel safe. Her hair was a pale orange and her eyes were golden. He had never seen anyone like her but then again he had never seen anyone like him or his father either.

She held him close and then handed him over to a man with golden brown hair and large brown eyes.

"I have to go help sissy," she said. "Hiro-chan, please watch over him."

"You don't have to ask Kisa-love," the man replied.

She kissed Hikaru on the forehead before heading towards Tohru.

The women surrounded Tohru. Hana and Uo refused to let her go. It was unspoken but every single woman in that group was afraid she would hurt herself.

"Sissy, please don't cry," Kisa whispered as she knelt over the broken women.

"It will get better," Machi said calmly. "You will see."

"I don't want to be without him. He was part of me. He was all I have," Tohru whispered.

"You are being selfish," Rin angrily.

The other women turned towards her shocked. Rin, however, refused to back down. Her eyes flashed as she gazed at Tohru.

"You have a beautiful son who needs you. I know that deep down that you know that but you are not thinking in your grief. You have think of someone other than yourself. Kyo and I grew up together. I am the closest thing to a sister he has and I know he wouldn't want you to become consumed. He loved you Tohru and the rest us of love you too. You are not alone."

Tohru sobbed as her body racked with pain. Slowly she let herself sink into the women's caresses and hugs.

To be continued….


	4. The Yankee

Chapter 4: The Yankee

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Please review. I look every day to see if this story has any reviews it saddens me that it's still sitting at two reviews. I hate asking people to review but unless I know what everyone is thinking I can't improve the story.

The days following the funeral were difficult for Tohru. She had heavy decisions to make. She needed find a job and a place to live. She needed to clean out her house and sell her property. She needed go through Kyo's things.

Arisa Uotani had never been one for sappy things. She knew what had to be done and gladly put off going to work to do it. She took time off explaining to her boss the situation.

"My friend just lost her husband and she needs help. She has a little boy she has take care of and she needs to move. Would it inconvenience you if I took some time off?"

"No, you go where you are needed. I'm sure I can work something out for you, Arisa," her boss had answered.

"Arigato."

Arisa couldn't bite back the feeling of déjà vu in the pit of stomach. This reminded her too much of when Kyoko died. The fact that they had been forced to come and remove all of Kyoko's things had been startling enough.

She remembered the shocked expressions on Tohru's face when she found a box of her father's clothing in the back of her mother's closet. Kyoko had been unable to part with a lot of her husband's things. There were pictures of the young couple together. There were several photos of Katsuya and a baby Tohru.

Arisa couldn't help but wonder if Tohru would do the same thing with Kyo's things. Would she keep Kyo's old karate clothes? Would she keep the DVD of the play because it would be a way for her to hear Kyo's voice? Kyoko had kept the tape from their answering machine.

"Hey Tohru," Arisa shouted as Tohru sat down on the couch.

"What is it Uo-chan?" Tohru asked trying to keep the tears from being heard in her voice.

Hikaru sat on the floor hugging his mother's feet.

"Did you ever listen to that tape Kyoko-san had?"

Tohru's eyes widened in surprise.

"No, I never did but I still have all the things of his that she kept. When I first left home I had paid for them to be put into storage. When we moved into this house we brought them with us."

"Do you think that we could listen to it?"

For the first time since Kyo's passing Tohru smiled.

"I would like to hear my father's and mother's voices. I forgot what he sounded like," she said.

Quickly she moved towards the linen closet. Hikaru was forced to let go but he followed her curious. He knew little to nothing about his grandparents except for Great-grandpa Honda and Grandpa Kazuma. His mother had told him that her mother was the famous red butterfly but he didn't know what that meant.

Tohru pulled down the box carefully. She rummaged through it and finally found the tape.

Her hands slightly shaking she put into the tape player.

**What are you doing Katsuya?**

**Nothing much.**

**I know you're lying. You're up to something.**

**I'm not up to anything Miss with no Eyebrows.**

**Very funny but I know you better than you think I do. You are always up to something.**

**That's not true.**

**Yes it is.**

**Is not.**

**Is too.**

**Is not.**

**What did you do before you had me to argue with?**

**I argued with myself but it was pretty one-sided.**

**You think you're funny?**

**No but you do.**

**You are impossible.**

**Thank you.**

**It wasn't meant as a compliment!**

**But I'm still taking it that way.**

**You are recording this on that tape aren't you? You are going to make this our message machine greeting!**

**Why Kyoko I have no idea what you're talking about. Would I do an underhanded thing like that?**

**Yes you would. Now hand me over that tape.**

**You'll have to take it from me.**

**Katsuya!**

His voice was deep and Tohru could remember it more clearly now.

"_To think you made this woman called the red butterfly, this feared women, faint. You're really something Tohru."_

"That was my grandparents on the tape?" Hikaru asked slightly surprised.

"That was my parents," Tohru answered.

Arisa was grateful for this moment but she knew that they had to get to work.

"Hikaru, would you start sorting through the things in your room. You know get all your dirty laundry together so we can do wash."

Hikaru did as his aunt told him.

Tohru's eyes remained fixed on her bedroom door. She hadn't been in there since Kyo died. She hadn't wanted to go in there. Now she would to face a room that would always remind her of Kyo alone.

"You don't have to go in there yet," Arisa said.

"We're moving at the end of the week," Tohru replied softly.

Arisa's eyebrow quirked. "Where will you go?"

"Akito and Shigure have offered me his old house. I didn't want to take it but they said that it was as much mine and Kyo's as anyone else's. They didn't want to sell it outside of the family and this way it stays within the family."

"Aren't you worried that it will remind you of Kyo?"

"Arisa, I don't want to ever forget him. I love him and I always will. Most likely I'll never fall in love again so the memories I have of him are precious. I want to raise Hikaru in a place that Kyo has been. I want my son to know about his father. I don't want him living with faded memories attempting to piece together the type of man his father was."

Tohru looked down at the ground for a second. Should she ask?

"I was wondering if you and Hana would like to move in with us—you are always complaining about your apartment and this way you have a big enough space plus I think Hikaru and I would get lonely without you it will work out because they are not charging me for the place though the mortgage is paid off so you and Hana could save money for a better place to live and things you need and this way--"

"Yes," Arisa said cutting off Tohru's rant.

"Yes?"

"Yes, I'll move in. I'm sure Hana will too."

"Arigato," Tohru said as she hugged her friend.

"It will be for a little while though until you don't need us anymore."

"I'm always going to need you and Hana but I know what you mean."

She glanced at the bedroom door and with a heavy heart she opened it to find--everything unchanged.

_It's as if nothing happened. It's as if I'm going to walk through the door and find him waiting for me._

His dirty clothes were still in a pile. His side of the bed was still a mess. The room was as it had always been. It was as if his very presence was in the room and she could feel him near her. She could smell him all over the room.

She sat down on the bed and sobbed. She would have to be strong for Hikaru, for herself, and mostly for Kyo. If she gave up she was failing him like Rin said.

Slowly she moved towards the closet. She would start there and work her way to the more difficult parts of the room.

_I'll never stop feeling lucky. I'm so lucky that you love me. Why did you choose an idiot like me?_

_Kyo, you are my most special person. Don't you ever forget that._

To be continued…..


	5. The Wave Sender

Chapter 5: The Wave-sender

To Saki Hanajima life was measured in waves. She could not deny the tempest that she felt surrounding the move into the house.

The move was difficult and to say it wasn't torturous would be a lie. Tohru sorted through everything. She rarely waited for Arisa or Saki preferring instead to do this alone while they prepared the other house.

This was her home with Kyo and it was her responsibility to put the memories to rest. She could not burden anyone else with the pain of the memories. She went through photographs and family movies. She cleaned out hers and Kyo's bedroom. She gave away few things because everything has meaning. Everything that Kyo had ever used had gained some unexplainable meaning. Everything had become precious.

She kept little things to remind her of Kyo. She kept his huge t-shirts and his karate uniform. She kept his razor and his cologne. She kept the little pieces of him and promised herself to never let him fade away from her.

She had made this promise once before, the promise that her mother would always be first in heart and her thoughts. Now she made the same promise to Kyo that she would keep living and that she would never forget him. Her love for him would transcend death just like her mother's love for her father had.

Hana felt the depth of Tohru's despair but she couldn't help her friend. Tohru would accept no comfort. She cried the day they left the house. She cried in the darkness of the night while the others slept. Her cries however didn't go unheard by her son.

Hana could feel the chaos swirling in the boy. It was a chaos mixed with grief and torment and fear. What did the boy have to fear?

Life without his father made the little boy more withdrawn. No matter what Tohru did nothing was able to cheer up her son or herself. The grief engulfed them like an icy blanket which they were unable to shake up. It was as if winter had descended upon the house in its icy fury to crush the sensitive souls who lived there.

The old house was exactly what Tohru remembered. She went through every single room allowing the memories to pour over her like a comforting blanket. Memories of those years with Yuki, Kyo and Shigure flooded over her. This was the house where she fell in love with Kyo. This was where she met him when he came crashing through Yuki's room.

Sometimes the memories pained her but at other times they comforted her. She could just hear Kyo yelling now. She could see his small smile. He was everywhere in this house and she was so grateful.

She moved into her old room and she put her son in Kyo's room. She wanted her son to be near his father even if it was only in memory. It made her smile to see the familiar orange head lying in that particular bedroom.

Still there was no laughter in the house. Uo and Han tried to ease the tense darkness surrounding the two remaining Sohmas. They tried to make the house cheerful but Hana could feel the waves of depression settle in.

"Tohru, are you feeling well this morning?" Hana asked her friend as she poured the morning tea.

"It is a pretty morning don't you think?" Tohru chirped masking her face with a smile.

"Tohru, it's alright for you to be sad. You have to right to feel—"

"I have to keep going Hana. I can't stop and cry. I have to get over this is my own way."

The waves read ill of this but for once Saki was speechless.

The only time Hikaru ever smiled was when someone came to visit. It was an empty smile devoid of happiness but it was a smile.

Several of the Sohmas had come to help make the move and adjustment easier. The hustle and bustle of people was something. Still Hikaru remained with the fake smile plastered over his face.

"Stop faking it kid," a man with black and white hair said.

Hikaru stared up at him in surprise.

"You're not happy so quit pretending. It's perfectly fine for you to be pissed off. Hell if I was in your situation I would've broken something by now," the man said sitting down next to the boy.

"It's alright to be upset?" he asked tentatively.

"Yes, you have every right to be angry or sad. Your father just died and you're moving to a new house. It's probably scary for you."

"How did you know what I was feeling?" Hikaru asked his voiced lined with anger. "Why does everyone think they know what I want? Why does everyone think that I'll just get over it?"

"You won't ever truly get over it. The pain will just lessen."

"When?" the boy demanded.

"In time. It might not be today or tomorrow or a year from now but it will stop hurting so much eventually."

"I don't believe that. It will always hurt."

The man chuckled drily, "You're just like him. Kyo must be so proud to have a son as stuborn as him."

"Did you know my dad?"

"I grew up with Kyo. He wasn't very good at hiding his feelings but when he tried he occasionally succeeded. You can't fool me because you look so much like him. He was always easy for me to read and so are you."

"You're another uncle aren't you?" the boy asked.

Tohru had explained when the boy was born that she considered every member of the zodiac to be an aunt or uncle. For the first three years the zodiac members were an avid part of the child's life. They came and visited but eventually Tohru and Kyo moved into their own house and life between the former zodiacs changed. They were no longer as interconnected as they had once been.

Of course the boy didn't know of the curse but he probably sensed that some of the Sohmas were more connected than others. Even with the curse gone it didn't matter. They had once all been possessed and they would forever have that bond. It was just now they didn't own allegiance to Akito or anyone else. They could live their lives as the pleased without any fear or pain. They belonged to this world alone.

"Yes, I'm another one of your uncles," the man answered.

"What's your name?"

"Hatsuharu but you just call me Haru."

"I haven't met all my uncles and aunts yet. I'm still a little confused," the boy said plainly.

Haru smiled softly. This boy was so like Kyo. He was not only image but he had some of the same spirit.

"Everyone will be glad to meet you. We knew you when you were a baby but you've been away so long that it must seem strange."

The boy nodded his head vigorously.

The days following the visit Hana sensed a changed in the waves. It was a small change but it radiated off the boy causing a bit of the house's icy depression to thaw. On the child's face was the first true smile Hana had seen since the funeral. The cause was nothing more odd than an orange kitten playing near the boy.

The first time Tohru noticed the mewing sound was when she entered the house after a long day of job hunting. Every day was the same. She would wander across the office district attempting to find a job. She needed to find one soon or else they would have no money. The long walks kept her mind off of her grief and made her interact with people outside of the small family that consisted of herself, Hana, Uo and her son.

At first she thought that she was imagining things. She could not have heard the mewing of a cat. It wasn't possible. Maybe she was imagining things.

Cats were something she associated with Kyo. It had been a long day. She had thought for a split second while walking down the street that she had seen her husband. For a split second she thought she saw him turning the corner. She had raced after him but it was only the torments of her mind playing tricks on her. He was not there.

She entered the kitchen to find her son, Hana and Uo crouched on the floor.

"What's going on?" Tohru asked slightly worried.

Hana motioned for Tohru to come closer. "Be very quiet Tohru. The poor thing gets startled by the slightest noise."

"It's not a thing," Hikaru interjected. "It's a him and his name is Neko."

"You plan on calling the cat simply 'cat?'" Uo questioned.

"What else should I call him? Besides he is a cat," the boy replied knowingly.

"Cat?" Tohru asked slightly taken back.

Hana could sense a wave of sadness rip through Tohru as she gazed at the orange cat. Why would her friend feel so grief by looking at the cat?

"Okaasan, can we keep him?" Hikaru pleaded. "I'll take good care of him."

"Hikaru-chan, I don't know if we need a cat," Tohru said her eyes never leaving the cat.

She knew it wasn't Kyo. The curse was broken and her husband wouldn't return to her this way. Yet the cat looked almost exactly like Kyo's zodiac form.

"Remember the story you told me?" the boy asked causing Tohru to look up.

"Eh?"

"About the cat who was tricked into not being in the zodiac? You always said that the cat was an orange cat. Dad used to say the zodiac cat was tough a cat who didn't have anyone until someone loved him. Please Mama, let me be the someone who loves this cat."

She had seen the smile on her son's lips while he gazed at the kitten.

_Tohru, I was so lost until I met you. I don't think I ever really lived until I loved you. How could you love me? I was the cat? I was a monster?_

_No my love, you were never a monster. When I was little I said that I wanted to be of the year of the cat, remember? I loved you before I met you my Kyo-kun._

Tohru smiled gently and tousled her son's hair.

Hana felt the grief retreat a little more.

To be continued…


	6. The Goddess

Chapter 6: The Goddess

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Thanks to all the reviewers out there.

Work was exhausting. Uo worked hard at the restaurant. She was a waitress around the clock. The work was nonstop and she barely had time to rest. The hustle and bustle allowed her to hear so many different stories and she knew the latest gossip.

Hana had gone to college and had become a psychiatrist of all things. She sat there day in and day out listening to her patients various problems. Her analysis was uncanny and her favorite patients were pathological liars because she could just threaten them with the waves to tell the truth. Of course she _rarely_ did that.

After three weeks Tohru had not found a job. She went out every day and walked the busy streets of the city. She offered to work at many low paying places but for some reason all her interviews didn't go well. She would get nervous and become unable to speak. She was desperate but she would not accept any charity in finding a job.

"Why don't you come back and work for Papa?" Momiji asked her.

Momiji had invited Tohru to the main house for lunch. Tohru had been naive enough to believe the lunch for just a simple lunch. Momiji, however, had other ideas. He was working with his father now and had wanted to help his friend anyway he could. Giving her a job was something he could do easily.

"I liked the ladies I worked with but I don't want to work nights. I have to be concerned about Hikaru. Besides it would be too much trouble for you, Momiji-kun," she replied.

"It would be no trouble at all. There is plenty of other work to be done besides cleaning."

"Momiji-kun, thank you for thinking of me but I can't impose. I want a job that I got on my own. I don't want to work for the Sohma family. I need to find a job for myself," Tohru said determinedly.

"You sound like Kureno," Momiji said quietly.

"Eh?"

"He went to college for a while and did pretty well. Afterwards he was forced to stay with Hatori for a few weeks until he could find a decent job. Hari offered him a job at the clinic but Kureno said he had to find his own way. He didn't want any of us to help him."

Before Tohru could respond a maid rushed into the room.

"Akito-sama wishes to see you," a maid said to Tohru.

Tohru stood up surprised. Momiji was slightly shocked himself. He told Akito of the meeting but the head of the family hadn't felt inclined to partake in the lunch.

"_It is between you and Tohru-chan. I'll see her at my own time," Akito said her eyes never leaving her gardenias._

How could he have known that "in her own time" would be during his meeting? Momiji smiled sheepishly while Tohru apologized profusely for leaving him.

"Gomen Momiji-kun. Gomenasai I don't want to leave you in such a state but I can't refuse Akito. Gomen you have been so nice to me and given me this nice lunch. Now I have wasted your time."

"Don't apologize Tohru-chan. It's not your fault that Akito-sama wants to see you."

Tohru smiled as she rushed out the door.

Akito Sohma sat in her garden watching her two children playing. It never ceased to amaze the former goddess that she had a son and a daughter. She who was doomed to die had given birth to two beautiful children.

There was Akira who was very much her son. He was a reflection of her stubbornness and her need for control. Mai was obviously her father's daughter. She was clever and always knew what was going on. The child's ability to charm information out of everyone was something Akito wasn't fond of. It reminded her too much of her husband's ways of conning her into listening.

Of course if her daughter turned into the manipulator her husband was, Akito would be forced to do something extreme.

"Akito-san, you are looking well," Tohru said.

Akito gazed at her friend levelly. She had longed to see this girl for so long. She had wanted to visit the house but she didn't know if she should. Tohru was still adjusting to the loss of Kyo and Akito didn't want to burden her friend.

Carefully she watched her friend for signs that Tohru was falling to the strain. Kyo's death had rocked the core of the dynamics among the former zodiacs. Even Akito who had never become friends with Kyo had mourned bitterly.

Kyo was the last cat. With the curse ended there would never be another. The cat had been the ostracized one. The cat was the one who paid for all of their sins. A life in captivity was the cat's reward.

Akito had threatened to do that Kyo. She had been so close to accomplishing that goal and trying to break Kyo's stubborn spirit but Tohru had stopped all of that.

It was Tohru who had freed them. It was Tohru who Akito owed for her fragments of happiness. She owed Tohru for her children and for her marriage to Shigure.

It was Tohru who had loved Kyo above all else. It was Tohru who was the first person to offer Akito friendship. Tohru who like Kureno gave entirely of herself.

Akito had never been able to mend the broken relationship with Kureno. He would not come to the main house and spoke to few of the former junishi. She had learned of Shigure's harsh words to Kureno. It pained her to think that she had created such hatred become two men who had once been as close as brothers. She had done all of this and she reaped the reward by loosing her friend.

She would not allow Tohru to become consumed by grief and thereby lose her as well. The fragile riceball was as much a Sohma as anyone else. Tohru had been the first person who had chosen to be Akito's friend and that bound Akito to her more than any curse could.

"I've missed you," Aktio said. "It was a sad day when you and Kyo moved. I would've come to the house but…."

"Oh no Akito-san, you have nothing to feel sorry about. The house has been an adjustment. Uo and Hana had to move in and I've been looking a job. Hikaru found this kitten on the property and so I've had to take it to the vet. It has been very busy," Tohru rambled.

Akito smiled softly. Some things never change.

It was then that Tohru's eyes gazed onto the two children playing. They were running around chasing each other like no tomorrow. The two children played tag happily.

Her smile became sad as she thought of her son. He was all alone without anyone to play with. He spent his days playing the kitten who had become his shadow. Still she wished that he had a little brother or sister to chase around.

Akito saw the sad smile. In the back of her mind she remembered her other reasons for asking Tohru to come.

"Tohru," Akito said softly, "is it alright if we go into my old rooms? I have so things I wish to talk to you about without the children hearing."

Torhu's eyes ripped away from the scene of childhood happiness to gaze at the former goddess. She meekly followed the older woman to the rooms.

The rooms hadn't changed much since Tohru had last been in them. The screen was still there and Akito's pillow on the floor.

The two of them sat down. The maids came and poured tea soundlessly.

"Tohru, I was hoping that you would consider working for Sohma house. I need someone who could help keep the other maids in line. It's not much but—"

"Gomen, Akito-san but I can't accept that offer. You and Shigure-san have already been too kind to me giving me the house. I want to find a job on my own," Tohru said her eyes downcast. "Arigato for thinking of me.

"Tohru, this isn't charity. I would like to have you work here."

"I can't. I will find a job. Please, Akito-san respect my decision,"

Akito wanted to keep pushing but she knew that Tohru wouldn't budge. This girl might appear to be sweet but she had the world's most stubborn will.

"Tohru, the reason I asked you to come talk to me was because I have a favor to ask you."

"Eh?"

Tohru's eyes got big. What could she possibly do for Akito?

"How old is your son, Tohru?"

"Hikaru is six."

"Akira is five. He doesn't often get to play with any of the other children in the neighborhood. The other cousins are much younger than him and Mai. Mai is three and Akira is getting bored of playing with her. I was hoping that Hikaru could come and play with the two of them."

Tohru smiled softly. "I would like that Akito-san."

To be continued……


	7. The Dragon

Chapter 7: The Dragon

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.

A/N: I am so sorry about the late update. I didn't mean to put it off for so long. The story is almost finished so the chapters will be posted quickly if not all at once. Again I'm so very sorry about the lateness of the update.

It was in shock that Kisa Sohma found her cousin wandering the street. The little boy was decked out in crimson blood which was obviously not his own. His clothes were torn and his face was tear-stained.

Hikaru wasn't oblivious to the secrets of the Sohma family. He wasn't oblivious to the whispers that surrounded him. When he walked down the street with his mother he could hear what people said.

"Look at that boy's hair."

"I wonder if that's his real color."

"Those red eyes are the most disturbing things I have ever seen."

"He can't possibly be that woman's child. He looks nothing like her."

The kids at school didn't even attempt to hide their contempt for him.

"You look funny."

"You're a freak."

"Why do you have orange hair and red eyes?"

This time the comments had gone too far. The six year old boy could take abuse as long as it was directed at him.

It all started because he didn't want to play with the other children. He stood alone leaning against the wall watching the others play.

"Hey freak, why aren't you like us?"

Hikaru turned his crimson eyes meeting the gaze of three other boys a year or so older than him. He just ignored them.

"I'm talking to you. You think you're too good to play with us?" the leader of the gang demanded.

Hikaru continued to stare off into space.

"I hear your father is a good for nothing who finally got what he deserved. As for your mother, my dad says she's a pretty lady but that she's got nothing for brains. She's as dimwitted as they come. She must be so sad to have born a thing like you. But then again she was stupid enough to take up with your worthless father," the leader jeered.

"My father wasn't worthless,' Hikaru said.

His voice was a low rumble. He could take any taunt directed at him but taunts about his parents were too far. His mother—he knew others thought she was naieve but she was a good person. She never asked for anything. His father had been a brave man and he had taught Hikaru to uphold his principles. Hikaru could take the tormenting of himself but his precious people were not deserving of such words.

"Keep saying that. Your mother can marry again maybe she'll bring home a decent man. After all she must be able to do something for a man. I head she's got nice legs and has such a sweet—"

The boy never got a chance to finish.

The boys were older than Hikaru who was only seven but Hikaru had heard that filth spoken before. Their parents spoke about other people as they weren't their and Tohru with her naïveté was just one their targets.

There were too many of them for Hikaru to take on alone and he was left a bloody mess. If he reported it to the teacher, they wouldn't care. He was the new kid and a few of these people had heard stories about his parents. So he did what any normal seven year old would do. He ran.

He had been wandering the streets for several hours when Kisa found him. At first he was scared of her not recognizing her from the funeral.

"It's alright," she said soothingly.

For a moment he was reminded of his mother as she placed a gentle hand on his forehead and picked him up. He was still small enough to carry and Kisa hugged him as she nestled into her shoulder.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?"

"I—they deserved it! No one talks about my parents like that. No one! I couldn't let them say those things and go unpunished! I—"

"Shhh, it's okay. Come on let's get you cleaned up."

She walked him over to the clinic and sat him in a chair.

"Sohma-san, I didn't expect to see you today," the receptionist greeted cheerfully.

Kisa smiled slightly. "Is Hari in Aki-chan?"

"Doctor Sohma has just gotten back from lunch. Do you need to see him right away?"

"My nephew is pretty banged up," Kisa said gesturing towards Hikaru who was glaring in the corner.

Aki gasped as she looked at the blood on the child. "I'll get Doctor Sohma right away. Why don't you bring him to the back?"

"Arigato, Aki-chan."

Kisa hoisted the boy up and took him into Hatori's office.

The former dragon sat quietly as he questioned the boy. The long hands moved over the cuts and scrapes. There was a lot of blood for a simple childish fight and that made Hatori wonder. "Please tell me you weren't fighting because they made fun of the color of your hair"

"Otousan always said that that was never a reason to fight. Okaasan said she was glad I had orange hair. So why would I fight because of that? I like being like my father!" the boy shouted.

Hatori shook his head. The boy was Kyo reincarnated even down to the glare. Hatori had visited a few times but mostly it was to check up on Tohru's health. He had noticed her exhaustion and had found an ally in Saki Hanajima who constantly informed him of Tohru's health. The boy seemed to be coping better but the fight—

"You can't act out like this."

"I wasn't acting out. I was defending my parents!"

"What happened?" Kisa asked softly. "Did someone say something about Sissy?"

Hikaru poured out his story. Kisa made him trust her. She didn't seem the type to judge or get angry and when he finished she just hugged him.

"Please don't tell my mother," Hikaru begged his uncle and aunt. "She already sad."

"I'm sure the school has already contacted her about you going missing," Hatori said.

"I know but—"

"Sissy will be very upset. I promise we won't tell her what the fight was about," Kisa said smiling at the boy. "But we tell her that you got into a bit of a fight and that you left school. We can't hide that from her."

"Just as long as she doesn't know what the fight was about," Hikaru said.

Kisa smiled. "We have a deal as long as if something like this happens again you come to one of us. Uncle Hatori and I will do whatever we can to help you."

"Hikaru, I suggest you go into the waiting room. Kisa will take you home in a few minutes."

Hikaru headed out to the hallway but stayed listening to the door.

"Kisa, I don't think you should hide such a thing from Tohru," Hatori said clinically.

"Hari, Sissy has been so sad. She doesn't need this right besides you know he's telling the truth."

"It's obvious."

"We can't tell Sissy. Besides he's a good boy just like Kyo was."

"I don't agree but I won't tell Tohru."

"Thanks Hari, you're the best."

Hikaru grinned. Aunt Kisa was his favorite aunt.

To be continued….


	8. The Rat

Chapter 8: The Rat

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.

It was Yuki who perhaps understood Kyo better than anyone else. Self-loathing had been his constant companion. Hatred was his best friend. That was until Tohru came into their lives. It was Yuki who had understood that to loose Tohru would be earth-shattering. Why hadn't he realized it was the same about Kyo?

"_One day you stupid rat I'm not going to be there to beat you. Then you're going to realize exactly what I meant."_

To think that idiot actually was right.

Tohru had been in a panic when she returned home. She still was looking for a job and finding it harder and harder each day. It wasn't that she wouldn't make a good employee. It was just that she got nervous during the interview.

"_Mrs. Sohma, I understand that you are looking for something that will allow you not to work long?"_

"_It's not that I'm looking for that necessarily—it's just that I have a son he needs me, his father just died and there has been so much going on—did I mention that I can type 180 words a minute—I'm a good typist—my son needs me I can't spend lots of long hours at the office—I'm admit I'm not doing too well with my husband's death it was sudden—did I mention that I really need this job I have a son to support—I know my education is lacking but I'm a hard worker I'm willing to do what ever it takes to keep this job—I need to take care of my son—I have mentioned that my husband just died—"_

"_Mrs. Sohma, I—we don't need an employee that is going through such an unstable time. Thank you for your time."_

Every interview followed the same pattern and Tohru was beginning to think that she needed to ask for help. She had been so determined to find a job by herself. She had wanted to not be a burden to anyone.

She had returned like she had every afternoon dejected and prepared to be comforted by Uo and Hana. Hikaru wouldn't come home until later and by then she would have a cheerful smile on her face. Last week had been especially hard. Hikaru had turned seven.

It was the first major holiday Tohru had celebrated without Kyo. It had hurt to not see him at the table and Hikaru hadn't really felt like celebrating. That had only made Tohru try harder to give him a special day. Instead the entire thing had back-fired leaving both mother and son more depressed.

So Tohru who was beginning to accept her husband's death found herself backsliding into denial and bargaining. Her depression increased and so her friends had tried to be there for her.

Uo was frantically calling from the telephone trying to reach the school. Hana had called her cell phone and let her know that Hikaru had run off. Combing the streets were Hana and Momiji, the only Sohma they could manage to reach. Tohru walked into the chaos and immediately all she could understand was that something had happened to Hikaru.

Her breathing became erratic as she felt her heart pound faster. She was trying to stop the room from spinning but she couldn't. She felt herself falling towards the ground with only strong arms halting her descent.

"It will be alright Tohru."

She nodded slightly looking into his soft eyes. "Yuki-kun how…"

"The school called me since I'm on the emergency contact list. I was on the train heading home otherwise I would've been here sooner. Why don't you lie down Tohru-kun? I'll help the others."

Tohru let herself be taken to her bedroom where Yuki tucked her in. Exhaustion seeped into her bones. She was so tired. While part of her mind rationalized that she should be out there searching for her son, the other side felt that she was too tired and helpless.

She had never been helpless before Kyo's death.

Kisa walked her tired nephew towards the house. The little boy frowned silently.

"I see you found him."

Kisa turned quickly to Saki Hanajima and her cousin Momiji. "Until I got your call I hadn't thought that anyone had noticed him missing. Gomenasi Hana-san."

Hana only waved her hand. She had called off the search party after she had gotten a hold of Kisa. "It doesn't matter. Perhaps this incident will force Tohru to quit grieving."

Kisa bit her lip. She had been aware that sissy hadn't been handling things well. The last time she had had lunch with Tohru had been traumatic enough.

"Where is sissy?"

"Yuki managed to get her to sleep a while_,_" Uo said as the others entered the silent house.

"Hana-chan, I'm going to go home. I'll give you a ride Kisa," Momiji said as the silence grew awkward.

Kisa nodded. While her and Momiji were both close to Tohru it was time for the family professionals to take over. With Yuki there an outside voice of reason was present. All she and Momiji could do was to remove themselves before they too became enablers to the grief stricken house.

"Kisa-basan?"

The former tigress smiled at her little nephew. "I promise I will come see you soon Hikaru."

"I don't want you to go."

"I have to. Remember you promised me and Hatori that you be able to face the consequences for what you did."

"Will you tell okasan about what started the fight?"

The tigress shook her head. "Unless you ask me to."

She wrapped the little boy up in her arms holding him close. _I miss you Kyo-ni. I wish…_

Tohru shook herself awake. Several hours had passed since Yuki had first forced her to lie down.

"Hikaru." She ran towards son's bedroom where the little boy was sitting. He gave a Kyo-look, the one that said he was tired.

"How could you scare me like that?"

She couldn't keep from yelling. Her anger at Kyo's death finding a target in her child.

Her voice went quiet. "I was so worried. The entire house was worrying. What would your father say to know that you—"

The dam inside of Hikaru broke. He had tried to understand. He had tried to move past but his mother's grief was choking him. He missed his father.

But Kyo wasn't coming back. He had heard his mother cry at night when she thought everyone was asleep. He knew that she wasn't really living but going through the motions. His aunts whispered their concerns about his mother daily.

He was more of an orphan now than he had ever been before.

"GO AWAY! I DON'T WANT YOU TO TELL ME IT WILL GET BETTER! IT WON'T! OTOUSAN IS DEAD! HE'S DEAD! HE LEFT US!"

He slammed the door on her face

Tohru sobbed as warm arms wrapped around her. "I want Kyo back," she whispered.

"You know that isn't going to happen. Kyo would do something so stupid if he could see you like this. Damn cat."

Tohru laughed at Yuki's use of the old term of endearment.

"I'm not saying to forget him. I doubt that is even possible for any of us he forced us all to acknowledge him. It's just he wouldn't want you to continue grieving this way. Hikaru needs you Tohru and so do the rest of us."

It seemed so long ago since she had come to this house. Back then she could see how much the two rivals had needed her. There had been the emotionally stunted Yuki and the fiery Kyo. Both had never felt love. In them she had found a reason to continue on. Her grief over her mother's loss had faded slightly.

They had loved her and she had loved them. With Kyo gone she had been slowly isolating herself again. She had put on countless facades but she couldn't maintain them.

They were supposed to be forever.

Yuki wrapped his arms around. For the first time since Kyo died he allowed himself to grieve. Their tears mingled as they began to surrender to grief and let healing start.

_ "You think that Tohru's going to flip when she finds out that that I willingly yet you be Hikaru's godfather?"_

"_She would have done it without your consent."_

"_Stupid rat."_

"_Damn cat."_

"_I'll never admit this if asked but I'm glad I've got you."_

"_Don't tell Ayame that you're more my brother than he is."_

"_Like I'd ever admit to that."_

To be continued….


	9. The Dog

Chapter 9: The Dog

The only time Hikaru had been inside of Sohma house was for the wake and even then he hadn't gotten a decent look at his surrounds. Everywhere he looked he could see houses sprawled out over the landscape. An entire village could have existed behind the Sohma walls.

He had come to the house to for a play date. His mother she was always assuming that he was lonely.

He didn't need other people. He was fine with it just being his mother and aunts. Besides Neko was the only friend he needed.

"Would you play with me?"

All resolve melted as he looked at little Mai her hair in little pigtails and her chubby legs coated in mud. Her brother Akira grinned just as covered in mud as his sister.

"We're building walls."

The shadow of grief retreated even more as the cat's kitten paid with the goddess's children.

From the window of his study the dog watched in silent amusement at the childhood antics. He turned back to his work. Maybe in watching the childhood interactions he would better understood what was going. His own boyhood days had been surrounded by the other two members of the trio and…Shigure shrugged why think of that. He hadn't missed that for so long that he didn't even want to remember. Never mind that he had liked his little tag-a-long. Never mind that he had enjoyed the adoration. Never mind that he actually missed _him._

It had been three weeks since Hikaru had become a frequent visitor to Sohma house. The boy and Akira had become close friends but it was Mai who had her older cousin wrapped around her finger. She avidly declared herself his princess and Hikaru didn't dispute the little games Mai played. He let her order him around and smiled at her like she was the only precious thing he had ever known.

Shigure was grateful for the kindness shown to his daughter. Mai was often considered a burden by her brother but Hikaru made sure she was included in all the games. It made Shigure like the boy even more.

"You know I don't like to meddle."

"Sure you don't Shigure."

"Hari! Look at how he abuses me Ayame."

"I know Gure-chan but Hari is after all being slightly difficult."

Hatori smoked his cigarette. He was only allowed this vice when alone with Shigure and Ayame. If Mayu didn't find out—which he cringed to think about—he might be able to smoke with them for many years to come.

"In all seriousness, I decided it was time to pick up the phone."

Shigure looked rather proud of himself. It had been one of the most difficult things to do. I mean how do you actually put aside that much animosity?

"Go on," Hatori prompted.

"It's become more and more noticeable that we've all grown apart. Kyo's death makes that painfully obvious. Tohru isn't doing quite as well as she pretends and the boy—I watched him you know. I watched him play with Akira and Mai. He's lonely. I could tell. A lot like Kyo in that."

"Get to the point Shigure," Hatori urged.

"Don't rush him, Hari. So Gure, what did you decide."

"I've had enough of it all. The curse is over and so we avoid each other like the plague. Akito has finally made peace with most of the family. We've all lived our own lives for ten years. Tohru and Kyo were only eighteen when they got married and a year later there was Hikaru. Still we did nothing about this mess. So I picked up the phone and I called the only number we had. I kind of expected him to show up today."

"Who?" Ayame asked. "Don't leave in the dark. Mine is getting that way and what with Sesshomaru—"

"Only you would name your son after an anime character," Hatori said.

"It's a beautiful name and he did look like that character when he was born. What with my hair and Mine's coloring."

"It's good manga too."

"Thank you Gure. See Hari, Gure approves."

"Like that it is a sign of taste."

"Ha-san is so mean.

A knock on the door broke up the argument.

"Gomen. I didn't realize where this was being held and since work held over I—"

"Sit down Kureno," Hatori said. "I take it that Shigure finally called you."

"That is what I was trying to say. I figured we might as well try."

Hikaru was back at the Sohma main house. There had been no one to watch him that afternoon. Okasan was back job hunting. Saki was visiting her brother who was attending the university. Arisa had tried to get off of work but three of her co-workers had decided to play hooky.

Tohru had been frantic. She hadn't wanted to leave Hikaru alone at the house with any adults and so she had tried to find a babysitter. She would've gone for a directory if Aunt Rin hadn't knocked on the door.

"Why not take him to visit Akira? Akito did say he was welcome anytime and since I am supposed to take you to your interview I can drop him off."

"Rin-chan, are you sure that Akito won't mind. It's short notice and—"

"Akira wants to play with Hikaru. Mai does too and it will do some good for him to be with other children. Besides it is vacation. He shouldn't be too cramped up in the house."

And so Hikaru had found himself at the Sohma mansion. The butler had shown him in and proceeded to lead him into a waiting room. That was where Shigure found him two weeks after the last guy's day. Today was another such day.

"Where's Akira?"

"He's with his mother. Akito took Akira and Mai to the park."

"Oh. Do you want me to wait here then for them to get back?"

Shigure grinned. This kid was so worried about stepping on someone's toes.

"No. You're coming with me."

Hikaru never knew what to think of Sohma House. There were so many rooms. Akira had told him that some of the rooms were sealed up in winter and some were sealed in summer. So when Shigure led him through the hallways in a direction he had never been he didn't think much of it.

"Gure, what took so long? That man is too--"

Ayame stop short from saying more when he noticed Hikaru. The boy however barely glanced at Ayame as Shigure led him into the room.

"Kureno!"

Kureno wasn't prepared for the little orange ball of energy that crashed into him. He laughed as Hikaru began to telling him all about what had happened since he had last seen him at the wake.

"You'd like Neko, Kureno. He's all trouble but Okasan says that all good cats have a bit of trouble in them. Everyone else has visited except you. Okasan says it's because you're busy but…."

Kureno cringed. He didn't dare say that the thought of dealing with Uo was keeping him away. He had wanted to see Tohru and Hikaru in fact they had been growing on his mind everyday. Rin called him to let him know their status about once a week. Of course she thought he should just go and visit. Without him talking to Arisa that wouldn't be possible.

Frankly, Tohru's home was now Arisa's home and to come without calling would make Arisa feel threatened. Kureno was all too aware of what a threatened Arisa would do. The odds of her even letting him the door without beating him senseless were nonexistent.

He couldn't say no though. Not to the little boy. Not to the only person who made him feel like he ought to try with his family.

"I will come visit. I promise."

"Soon?"

"Soon."

"You better not break your word. Otousan always said that people that broke their word were the lowest of the low."

"I promise. I never go back on my word."

"Good."

Shigure grinned as he watched the little boy drag Kureno out into the garden.

"I think guys' day has been forgotten about entirely," he said brightly.

"Gure?"

"What are you grinning about Shigure?"

"I never thought Kureno would come back. I thought I would have to beg and apologize to make him come. I should've just told him Hikaru was visiting and then he would've shown up without any persuasion."

The others stared speechless.

_I bet you didn't think you would be the glue to fix us. Arigato Kyo._

To be continued….


	10. The Horse

Chapter 10: The Horse

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.

Rin Sohma was a lot of things. Independent woman. Mother. Wife. But she rarely acknowledged herself as anyone's friend or sister.

Still if she had a sibling, it was Kyo. Even after the breaking of the curse Kyo would regularly phone Rin. It had been a type of secret between them, a silent acknowledgement that they were siblings. Kazuma after all had raised them both and now Rin found herself at the old dojo staring at what was once Kyo's room.

"So Tohru agreed?"

Kazuma nodded. "She wants him to learn. Apparently Kyo taught him some."

"And you don't mind? You did retire a few years ago."

"For my grandson, I'll come out of retirement. Besides aren't you going to eat dinner with Tohru tonight?"

"Haru wanted to spend quality time with the girls and who am I to argue. Besides I kind of goaded Kureno into going to dinner. He needs to go over there and talk to Arisa and force her to get past that period of her life. It's not good for either of them and frankly Hikaru adores Kureno. I don't know why."

"Perhaps it is the same reason the rest of you always seek Kureno out. He has a calming presence. Even Kyo admitted it to me. 'Kureno's different. He doesn't hate like the rest of us do.'"

"I suppose. I never noticed that he was the easiest person to talk to. He doesn't argue back. He just listens. No wonder Akito kept him close."

Kazuma shrugged. There were many inner workings of the zodiac that he didn't understand. Kyo's rejection by the other junishi had been a sore spot for years but each junishi was living in a type of hell. Each little hell had painful repercussions. Kazuma had learned that when he had taken in Rin. Before he had thought that it was just Kyo—just the curse of the cat. But with Rin and her continual self-loathing he learned to recognize it as the curse of all the junishi.

"I miss him," Rin said.

"I know. I do too."

"I wanted to cry like Tohru did. I wanted to scream at the world for its unfairness but I didn't. I couldn't. It was like that piece of me was still broken. I wanted to express everything I felt and all I could think is that that someone had to be there to pick up the pieces. Someone had to make sure Tohru didn't break too much. That Hikaru wasn't too damaged. I…"

Kazuma hugged her. "No one else will know if you cry now."

"Arigato," Rin said between her tears.

Uo sat in the kitchen. It wasn't often that she worked on bookwork but since she had decided that perhaps a little bit of schooling might make life more bearable she was constantly working on homework. It was a small college and her degree would only give her a certificate that would make her a legal secretary but it was a step up from waiting tables.

Tohru was out grocery shopping. Hikaru had gone with her. Hana was still at work or so she said but Uo knew that wasn't entirely the case. It had become more and more obvious over the past few months that Hana had met someone. She wouldn't say who or where but her continual absence from home was obviously an excuse.

Uo let it slide. Tohru was still job hunting. She had looked long and hard at her savings and promised to giver herself a month. In a month if she didn't find a job she would go to Momiji and accept his offer to rejoin the cleaning staff. She was getting her education. Hana was dating. Hikaru was adjusting to school. All was right with the world.

Until he walked in the door.

Arisa was angry. Her eyes were zoned in on Kureno. Rin could feel herself not even considered. She was like a piece of shading in the background.

"What are you doing here?"

Kureno didn't flinch. He didn't even move when Arisa shouted. "I told Hikaru I'd visit."

"So you drop by unexpected?"

"No. Tohru knows I'm coming. I asked that she take Hikaru with her when she went shopping for dinner so I could talk to you."

Arisa boiled with anger. She had heard Hikaru talk about Kureno. The boy seemed fond of him. A bit more fond of him than most of the other Sohmas. There were exceptions like Yuki and Kisa who had integrated themselves in with the family. Hikaru loved visitors and he loved talking about the stories they told. Kureno had become a favorite rather quickly and Arisa still had yet to figure out why.

"Unbelievable. So what do you want?"

"Not to fight with you."

"Too late for that. You expect me to forgive you for walking out on me."

"It wasn't like that. We were living in each other's pain. We never moved forward from our own personal hells. You were safe Arisa and with you I didn't need to face the world."

"YOU'RE BLAMING ME!"

"No. I was not the man who could love you Arisa. You deserve someone better."

Uo stared hard. Her eyes lined with faint tears. She wasn't so weak to cry over someone like Kureno.

"Do you still…?"

There was a time when Kureno would have been nice and lied. He would have minced his words to make her feel better. But he had learned long ago with Akito that truth was necessary.

"No."

Uo nodded as she packed up her books.

"Uo-chan?"

Arisa gazed at her friend. Hana held out her arms and hugged the former yankee. The waves were strong in the room. She led Arisa to her bedroom.

"He doesn't love me anymore," the sobbing girl whispered.

"Then move forward. You do not need to define yourself by him."

Dinner that night was a quiet affair. Arisa barely spoke but she couldn't help but notice Hikaru's happiness at Kureno's presence. She had never considered that perhaps Tohru's friendship with Kureno had suffered because of her. She knew that Tohru had been the one to persuade Kureno to find her. Tohru had match make for them and it didn't matter that the match had failed. For Tohru, Arisa Uotoni would do anything.

Arisa smiled as Hikaru laughed. The little boy was so happy.

"You would never believe it! Akito-sama says that if Kasan allows it then she'll take Mai, Akira and I to the beach. She says that are lots of big shells."

Kureno laughed. "Akito-sama would know. She loved to find shells when she was little."

Hikaru laughed.

_Yes, I can let go._

Rin sat on the other side of the table. _I believe your family will be ok little brother. They'll make it._

To be continued…


	11. The Snake

Chapter 11: The Snake

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.

Time is the greatest mender of heartache. For Tohru Sohma and her son, it was a constant reminder but eventually with the changing of the seasons so too did their grief subdue. Kyo had died in the early spring months when the rains are still cold. His fire had been quenched by water but the embers were buried in his son. Hikaru learned to be strong and his flame was bright.

The family dinners were becoming more common. Various members of the former zodiac came often. They, the last of the cursed ones, spent vast amounts of time bringing life into the house. Both Hana and Arisa encouraged these dinners especially when they saw how much Tohru brightened around family and Hikaru thrived in the company of those who had known his father.

So it was no surprise when invites were treasured.

Ayame smiled at his invite. Mine and Sesshomaru would normally accompany him but last week both of them had left to go to a new fashion show in Milan. Ayame had wanted to go but had decided at the last minute that Mine should spend some time with her sister.

"You are always saying that Aki-chan spends too much time as Hari's receptionist. She's always so stressed out and I hate that because it stresses you out. Not that Hari's bad at his job, no, but patients are demanding. Aki needs a break and so do you. Sesshomaru wants to go to Milan. I have to stay for business and you need a vacation."

"If you're sure Ayame. You know how you are when I leave."

"I'm sure Mine. Go have fun beautiful one and I'll still be here."

Of course he had been an idiot about letting them go. Aki had hugged him tightly happily going on a vacation for the first time in five years. Hari had been grateful too telling Ayame that he was growing up. While the compliment made Ayame beam, he deeply depressed.

His home while beautiful was extremely empty without his wife and son. Both of them had a presence that made Ayame n

He should've known that Tohru would've noticed.

"Hello, Ayame-san!" Tohru called brightly.

She was smiling not the open smiles of her youth but a smile that was at least real.

"I'm glad you invited me to dinner, Tohru-chan. I've really been beside myself."

"Well," Tohru pressed her fingers together slightly. "I invited you for two reasons. Hikaru told me you were lonely. He noticed it the other day when he was at Sohma House."

_Ayame remembered that day rapidly. It had been a day for the men of the Sohma family meaning himself, Shigure, Kureno and Hatori to get together. Akito had surprised them by joining them all for lunch. She had barely raised an eyebrow at Hatori's smoking. Her eyes were watching the children outside. Hikaru was playing with little Mai making the little girl shriek with wild laughter as he and Akira pulled her in a wagon._

"_She certainly is their princess," Shigure said watching._

"_Yes," Akito whispered. "You should bring Sesshomaru sometime Ayame. I'm trying to set a play date for all the children including Rin and Hatsuharu's little girls. It has been difficult in the planning but…"_

_Ayame smiled sadly. Sesshomaru had been playing with Hikaru the other day when Yuki brought them the little cat to visit. Sesshomaru by his nature was a very different type of boy. For one, he knew more about fashion the most children ever did. Secondly, he was aloof. Someone, Ayame hadn't figured out which child it was, had told Sesshomaru that he was a freak. The word had affected the little boy deeply and while his parents assured him he was nothing of the sort, Sesshomaru avoided other children._

_Hikaru was like Kyo though. Kyo could care less who a person was as long as they didn't treat him badly. Hikaru had been so kind to Sesshomaru that Ayame watched in amazement as his son opened up. In a short while Hikaru was being called Hika-chan by Sesshomaru and Sesshomaru was simply Maru-chan._

"_It will be a good idea, Akito-san. Hikaru seems to bring out the best in the children," Hatori said quietly._

_As he was leaving for the day, Ayame almost collided with Hikaru. The little boy was walking home from Sohma house with a watchful Hatori driving a few feet behind. Ayame could make out Kureno's car sitting outside Tohru's house as the former-rooster waited for the little boy to make it to the door. Overprotective to the extreme but Ayame couldn't help but smile as he saw Shigure watching from the house._

"_I meant to ask you Ayame-ji," Hikaru said softly, "if you had hard from Maru-chan?"_

_Ayame's smile faded. "I talked to Mine last night and she and Sesshomaru are having fun. Sesshomaru told me to tell you that he would bring you something from the trip."_

_Hikaru looked at him before hugging him. "I'm sure they miss you too, Ayame-ji."_

"And I have an interview tomorrow and I wanted your opinion on my wardrobe," Tohru continued.

Ayame looked at her in shock. "I don't often do professional. I'm mostly in the field of making dreams reality. Allowing people to live out their own secret gardens of fantasy."

"I know but some people must dream of looking professional. Please Ayame, I don't know what to do. I worked on my interviewing with Hatori. He made me go through the questions and think up answers. Shigure-san made me practice my charm before Akito-san back-handed him and told me to be myself. It's just…I need a job. I don't want to ask Momiji-kun."

"Say no more, Ayame to the rescue. You will be the most professional looking woman at that interview. I guarantee it."

Ayame was at the shop fidgeting. This was nervewrecking. More nervewrecking than that time he had had to make ten male wedding dresses in a two day order period. Yuki was sitting in the shop watching his normally poised brother chew his nails.

"It can't be that bad Ayame."

"I never do professional. I'm a dream-maker. A king among the artistic. A man of fantasies and passions. When do I ever do professional attire? I make costumes for a living and now I've made a suit. Not just any suit but a suit for Tohru-chan to interview in at a job interview for a job she must get or else she will be forced to beg Momiji and she doesn't want that and if I screwed this up then what will I do."

"Try breathing nisan. It helps," Yuki said.

An hour and three hundred more panic attacks later Tohru walked into the shop.

"Well?" Yuki asked while Ayame paced.

"I got the job. They said I was very qualified and were willing to work with my schedule requirements."

Thud.

"Ayame-san!" Tohru yelled worriedly.

Yuki just glanced at his brother who had fainted. "Poor aki thought that he had ruined your chances."

"Eh?"

"He's never made a suit before."

Once Ayame had recovered there was much celebration. Tohru happily became familiar in her job finding that working made her more inclined to feel better. She adjusted quickly but the rest of the family had some difficulties. Uo and Hana were both used to Tohru almost always being at home. They had come to take small household chores for granted and were now struggling with adapting. Not that anyone minded. Tohru smiled more now that she working. Her fiancial worries one less thing to think of.

She had been leaving work when she saw him. At first surprise kept her quiet for she hadn't known he had worked there. But then again he never said much about himself unless directly asked.

"Kureno-san?" Tohru said staring at the back of one of the accountants.

"Tohru-kun? What are you doing here?" Kureno asked.

His day had been terrible what with Yuu calling in sick again. Yuu's wife Haruka had fragile health and Kureno had learned very early on from his partner that Yuu had to leave when Haruka took ill what with Haruka being in and out of hospitals. However, today had not been the right day for Yuu to call in. Their report to Yamanashi Industries' investors was due today and Kureno had been forced to come in extremely early. He had not even stopped to have tea this morning or breakfast of any sort. Working through his lunch was enough a disaster and he was tired and hungry and genuinely not in agood mood. But Tohru had the effect of making tired Sohmas more sociable.

"I was hired two days ago as the new secretary for Akame Shinji. And you?"

"I've been one of the accountants here for the past two years. It's a good place to work. Congratulations on the new job."

"Arigato."

It became a regular routine for the two of them to run into each other at the job. Kureno who often had found work stressful smiled more when he spoke to Tohru. It was never anything elaborate or intrusive. Instead it was them meeting quite by accident until the day Tohru spotted him eating at the cafeteria.

"Kureno-san, you actually eat that food?" she asked scandalized.

"Hai. I often don't have time to make a bento and going into the city for lunch at a restaurant is too time consuming. I work through lunch mostly."

"So, do I," Tohru said, "but that doesn't mean you can't eat a good lunch. Here, I will make you a bento and bring it with me to work."

"Tohru-san, I couldn't…"

"My son is found of you, Kureno-san as am I. Do not make me tell Hikaru what his favorite uncle eats for lunch. He will insist I make you lunch."

Kureno merely nodded. "Arigato, Tohru-san."

It took Tohru a few weeks to approach Ayame store again. This time she had a request for him.

"Mine-san?"

"Tohru-chan!" the woman exclaimed as she ran to hug her friend.

"When did you get back?"

"Two days ago. I've been so tired from the flight. What brings you here?"

"I wanted to tell Ayame-san that I want him to make more suits for me."

"I heard about the suit," Mine giggled. "Aya-chan was so nervous."

"My work is paying for three more outfits."

Ayame watched in the corner as Tohru and Mine talked design. He hadn't seen Tohru smile in so long that it surprised him when she laughed so loudly.

"_She'll be fine Kyo. She'll be fine."_

"Well ladies, let's talk color!" Ayame said joining them.

To be continued…


End file.
